Communication In Relationships

WebAdmin • April 12, 2011

We have a simple but wise saying in the psychotherapy world: “If it’s mentionable, it’s manageable!”It’s so true, especially in intimate partnerships. So often I see couples “sitting on” giant resentments, presumptions, hurts, misconceptions, and bewilderment that could probably be worked out if there’s a value to each in the relationship. Haven’t most of us stayed silent at times, fearing the consequences, only to find out that the “bogeyman” was in our own head?

I have three wishes for my Relationship Genie:

  1. That partners would generally give each other more credit for having the potential for a reasonable response to each other’s concerns, and make presumptions of “good will”.
  2. That people would more often value their own experience, not discount it, and be willing to stand up for themselves by speaking up.
  3. That we’d all legitimize the fact of “alternate realities” around situations, be more curious about each other’s experience, (getting away from “right” or “wrong”), and practice the fine art of listening better.

(That’s sort of three and a half, but hey, the Genie has magical powers, so why stop at three?) Good night and good luck!

Susan Lager

PS. For more of my thoughts and tools for communication, sign up for a series of Free Reports at the button on the right.

The post Communication In Relationships appeared first on Susan Lager.

By WebAdmin February 6, 2026
Greetings Reader, Do you remember one of those days when everything that could go wrong, did?  It happens to the best of us, and when it unfolds it feels like a sick dominoes game. My husband had one today, and couldn’t stop talking about all the gory details. Then when he was done, he seemed […] The post Marriage and Bad Hair Days appeared first on Susan Lager.
Couple holding hands, standing in a park, smiling. Man in denim shirt, woman in white top, soft sunlight.
By Cheryl Conklin February 3, 2026
"Cheryl Conklin is a writer, tutor, and lifelong adventurer dedicated to promoting wellness and personal growth. As the founder of Wellness Central , she shares insights, resources, and experiences drawn from her journeys and passion for balanced living, helping others pursue health, happiness, and fulfillment."
By Cheryl Conklin January 16, 2026
"Cheryl Conklin is a writer, tutor, and lifelong adventurer dedicated to promoting wellness and personal growth. As the founder of Wellness Central , she shares insights, resources, and experiences drawn from her journeys and passion for balanced living helping others pursue health, happiness, and fulfillment"
Couple embraces at the beach, heads touching. Ocean in background, overcast sky.
November 19, 2025
The early days of marriage feel like a mixture of comfort, discovery, tiny surprises, and the occasional “Wait, you do it like that?” moment. Building a shared life is not about creating a perfect routine. It is about shaping a partnership where both people feel supported, understood, and genuinely excited for what comes next. The Nitty Gritty Create shared habits, stay curious about each other, talk about money openly, combine dreams with practical planning, and keep joy in the mix. This is your roadmap to a solid relationship.  FAQ
October 24, 2025
Anxiety attacks rarely ask permission. They sneak in when the calendar is packed, when your phone won’t stop buzzing, or when even the people you love most can’t seem to help you calm down. If you're in a relationship, anxiety can feel doubly complicated — you’re managing your own emotional regulation while trying not to transfer that stress onto your partner. It’s a tightrope walk. The good news? You can build a daily structure that lowers your baseline anxiety and prevents full-blown panic from creeping in. Below are grounded, real-world techniques that help intercept anxiety before it spirals.
Bride and groom embrace outdoors, smiling. She wears a white lace dress; he wears a black suit.
October 1, 2025
Planning a wedding is a full-time job. So is buying a home. Now imagine doing both at once — while also preparing to move, host family, and not lose your relationship in the process. For many couples, these life events collide within the same six to nine months, each demanding time, money, and emotional bandwidth. But chaos doesn’t have to be the default. With a bit of pre-alignment and some sharp trade-off thinking, you can move through all three transitions without burning out or breaking the bank.
Man and woman high-fiving, in a brightly lit living room.
September 16, 2025
You want to feel better together, not just “less stressed” in parallel. Aim for small, shared practices that nudge your bodies toward calm and your bond toward steadier connection. Treat each experiment as playful, not perfect, so you’ll both return to it next week. Keep the stakes low, the sessions short, and the feedback kind. Write down what helped and what didn’t so future you can copy the wins without overthinking. The point isn’t to become experts; it’s to build a few rituals that make hard weeks gentler and good weeks richer.
September 2, 2025
If you’re a college student with ADHD, you should feel proud of your accomplishments. However, if you have ADHD, meeting your academic goals can be challenging. Managing your ADHD and achieving academic success is a result of persistence and hard work. Thankfully, there are many tools and strategies to ensure a successful college experience. Everything from time management and memory improvement to mindset changes and accessibility aids on campus can boost your study skills and help you meet your goals.